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Open Heart… What is an open heart? Is it one that shares everything with everyone, or one that is selective on how it pours out? I’ve asked myself this question many times before, “Don’t I usually wear my heart on my sleeve?” The answer is no.  Even though I pour out I have to battle and understand that there is a very thin line that sometimes I don’t see myself crossing but I do. My whole desire is to please the Lord and to pour out in service to others, how could I not with knowing what He has done. Recently, however, it's seems as though I’ve been playing hopscotch with the intentions of my heart.    

As I was talking to my friend over a study session he asked me why I didn't not blog my thoughts, my response shocked me when I said, "I'm afraid of what people might do to my heart. Afraid...I'm afraid? As I said that, God's word reminded me, "Don't be afraid of those who want to kill your body; they cannot touch your soul. Fear only God, who can destroy both soul and body in hell. -Matthew 10:28"  In my service to others, I realized I'm pouring out in action because I love, only because He has loved me first but in that service I have not been receiving. Get ready for some visual aid: It's as if I have a room filled with amazing toys and I want to give them to others, and in order to give, I slightly open the door and put the toys outside for others to receive. I don't keep that door opened, I am more guarded than I thought I was. And as a result that room was becoming empty. 

In my desire to feel the approval of others I've allowed  people to hold my heart instead of Jesus. Jeremiah 17:9 tells us "The heart is deceitful above all things
 and beyond cure.
Who can understand it?" I was not trusting God with friendships and relationships, because there was a blurry line that I had crossed. I had the misconception that in order to trust people I had to open my heart and let people hold it to let others in. How can I do this when my heart is still recovering from spiritual surgery. But that's just it, it dawned on me that an open heart can be guarded by the one who holds the world in His Mighty Hands. In Jesus there is security and there is comfort. So here is my opened heart for you, because I'm called to let you in, and let you see what the Lord is doing in my life and how intricate His hands work in healing and binding wounds. Only HE can repair, only He can mold, and only through Him can all things be made new. 

Jeremiah 12:3 But you oh Lord, you see me, and you test my Heart towards You. 

Thank you for reading my thoughts. 

<3 His Jocelyn